Today is my 4th day in Abu Dhabi. I still haven't sorted out how I feel abut this whole experience. At times, I feel quite exhilarated and excited with our new prospect but at other times, I start thinking if this is all a big mistake.
Abu Dhabi is a beautiful, breath taking city. But it is also a daunting city. Not because it is unsafe, but because everything is so picture perfect, prim and proper and so orderly. Quite the contrast to what this helter skelter mom is used too. I'm just terrified I can't cope.
The highlight here seems to be the shopping and dining out. As i'm not much of a shopper (especially now that I'm all preggy) I'm not enjoying it as much. The people here also appears unfriendly, maybe due to the various races and culture stuck here in this foreign land, everyone seems to keep to themselves and mind their own business.
Being with the kids without help this past few days has made me realized how I've been neglecting my children during my studying period. In this new environment, Sarah seems to be out of control and most of the time obnoxious and rude. I don't know if she has always been this way or its just that this new surrounding makes her appear so. I have observed during my countless trips to the mall so far, all the children are very, unbelievably well behaved. They could actually sit still (literally sit still and stare at their surrounding) while their parents chat away with friends during meals. Screaming children seem totally unheard off and when my children act up, the people here turn and stare which really gets on my nerves and is quite embarassing.
I don't know if its just my parenting skill (or lack of it) or the children here are just developing abnormally. 4 days here and various trips to the mall and with the exception of my own children, not a single screaming child in sight. Kinda scary...to me at least.
On the other side, being with the kids without any help gives me the opportunity to 'reprogram' my kids. I have complete control over my children andI can reprimand my children for their bad behavior without worrying that the maid and grandparents will pacify them and just make them regress back to their previous bad behavior. I am worried though that when I go back home that all my hard work here will just be forgotten and the children will lapse back to their previous behavior.
Which brings me to another important issue. Although I'm adamant about giving birth at home, I don't know whether I should go back or stay on till my impending birth. I don't like to leave dearest hubby here all by himself as there is no one to take care of him and as beautiful as Abu Dhabi can be, its not home so it can still get pretty lonely here. I've got 2 weeks to continue to contemplate and ponder. I do miss home but my future is here. Sigh.